Ever feel like the days just keep coming and you are here and you really don't know why and is it really worth it anyways cause you are getting nowhere and you have this overwhelming feeling of "I WANT OUT!" and you aren't sure if it is cause you've been alone too long or if it's the emotional drone of Coldplay you are listening to or the fact that your work uniform requires you to sport a purple tshirt, or maybe, just maybe, by some miracle, it is "that time of the month"?
Yeah, I don't have those days either.
I wouldn't want to cause it sounds awful.
This is the type of material that BTK says to be careful about posting. Says people will worry or think that something is wrong.
Nothing is wrong. I'm just normal.
But it's just one of those days.
I have a nickname at work. They call me "panicky rene". It's funny cause it's true. You should see me some nights, running between my guests and the kitchen, flailing my hands in the air when other servers ask if I need help. It's quite a scene. And to think, they actually let me manage that place at one time. The restaurant business is not for me. But I do it cause it's fun. Even when the stress during the dinner rush takes hours off my life, it is fun.
So why, oh why, when I get that same panicky feeling at home, is it not fun? Or is it? I can't decide. I am leaving shortly for work, so perhaps I have conditioned myself to feel this way on days that I work. Maybe I'm just anticipating it happening, that feeling of "I'm so in the weeds, I might as well just stop and let it all run me over and put me out of my misery!"... even though when it's over we can laugh at how hard we were all spanked that night... or laugh at the fact that I was the only one with the deer in the headlights look, even though we weren't that busy (cause that is usually funny to the other servers).
I'm good at waiting tables, don't get me wrong. I just don't handle the stress as well as some.
I actually feel better just having posted this mess of thoughts. Thanks!
I think I'll head into work now :)
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2 comments:
Hey girl! I love this little blog of yours. I got the address from Bethany and I must say that I visit often. You are just the most funny girl in the world...and reading your thoughts on here makes me feel like I still get to "talk" to you. I think that you are right on about having tough days (I'm in one myself). You are being too hard on yourself about the work thing...you are good and no one in the dining room would ever be able to tell that you ever get flustered. I miss ya!
Marci
Hey - you stress because you care. Maybe you can wait on me and MDH sometime - we are excellent customers and tippers to boot.
Waiting tables when you care about doing a good job is really hard. People can be very mean.
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