Because you weren't here...

Because you weren't here, I felt a sense of loss
Like a piece was missing from my life
Like part of the story went untold
Like I was looking for something I wouldn't find.



Because you weren't here, my eyes were wet
My heart felt constricted
My body was a little lost
Trying to navigate through that first day after I hung up the phone.



Because you weren't here, I shopped only for myself
Buying less and preparing less
I didn't open the Oreo's
I was forced to eat a pear.



Because you weren't here, I considered only myself
And found that myself was worth considering
I opened a book and enjoyed a read
I opened my journal and laid down some ink.



Because you weren't here, I talked less
And listened more to the voices in my head
They started to speak loudly of needs and wants
Of myself and of you.



Because you weren't here, there was less guilt
You are on vacation
It's okay if I'm on vacation
And I'm enjoying my time a little more.



Because you weren't here, the house is missing a beat
For you are part of the rhythm
That keeps this place alive
The song has not been as pretty since you've been away.



Because you weren't here, I didn't sleep as well
When I woke at 3am to cops and dogs and flashlights
Directly in front of the house
No one to comfort me that I was safe.



Because only I'm here, with the dogs and the growing belly
I am lonely
No one can fill the space that you fill
My heart is a bit empty

Because you aren't here, I've no one to complain to
No one to lift their shirt and offer to carry the baby
Then kiss me on the forehead so sweetly
Even though I might cry.

Because you aren't here, there is less laughter
Less to say
Less hugs and kisses
Less companionship.

Miss you babe :)